Thursday, March 19, 2009

Pack It Up

My morning routine is pretty simple. Shower, dress, minimal make-up, blow dry my hair. That's about it. I try to look good, but I don't stress over it. Total time spent on getting me ready? About 20-25 minutes.

It took me over an hour today.

I must have changed my clothes at LEAST six times. Nothing fits. None of my button down shirts will button over my incredibly swollen chest. If I find something that fits my chest, it's too tight around my middle, which is SO bloated. I'm ready to pack up my entire closet and give it away.

My face is quickly becoming a mess, too. My forehead is breaking out, and nothing seems to be helping. So, not only do I feel like crap, I look like crap, as well. No amount of make-up can cover up the bumpiness, I swear it only amplifies it.

Looking in the mirror is an insult, honestly. I'm already disgusted with my body's failures at holding on to a pregnancy, and that's before I see what is staring back at me. Puffy, red eyes from crying, an acne filled forehead, buttons straining to fly open, and rolls on my stomach.

Oh, and I started spotting this morning.


  1. honey, I am so sorry. Hang in there. I know this must be hard. I am praying for and I know that you will make it cause you are too strong.
    Love ya'

  2. fvckin' a. yeah, that is just insulting. you need a drink of wine. wish i could help. ((Sigh))

  3. I'm with apron strings. WIsh i could take you out and get you some fruity adult beverage!

  4. How horrible. I know with my miscarriages, I'm always super bloated, have sore breasts (which are larger) and more and more pregnancy symptoms- even after I *know* that I'm losing it. Its like a slap in the face, really.

    I'm so sorry for your loss.

  5. I'm right there with you. My boob soreness/nausea just went away and I started bleeding a couple of days ago. It really is so horrible to have pregnancy symptoms and know that it's failing. It truely is a slap in the face.

  6. Here from LAFC. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm experiencing the same thing (post-miscarriage bloat, general nasty feeling) and know just how awful it is. You are not alone.

  7. UGH sweetie. Too bad you don't live closer. I'd take you out for coffee or something. Remember you are not alone.

    HUGS and prayers to you like always.

  8. ((HUGS)) I'm so, so sorry. WHat a horrible day. :(

    Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

  9. I am so sorry. I hate this for you and am sending you all the love I've got.

  10. I am so sorry for your loss, hang in there (((HUGS))

  11. I am sorry you are having a hard time. Hang in there and I hope things get better soon!