Big Thanks & 28 Weeks

You are all the BEST!

Seriously.

I've gotten such good ideas for seeing what can be done, if anything...and now I have an idea of what to ask, look for, etc.

I can not thank you enough...this is what I love about our IF community.

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As for the insurance crap, not much has changed.

I spent most of the day yesterday on the phone with HR, who was making multiple calls on my behalf. We keep getting conflicting information, so we're just going to keep badgering them for now.

The big problem is that without a group or policy #....which I can't find out, because we aren't "officially" on this insurance...the hospital can't give me an answer. People in the contract department at the hospital say that they have a contract with the insurance company as of January 1st of this year, but the insurance company says they don't.

Ugh.

I go back to the doctor on Monday, and I'll start talking to her about it.

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Another milestone today, as I'm officially 28 weeks along with the twins!

Overall, I'm feeling pretty good and can't complain too much.

I do tire easily.

I'm starting to have daily ankle swelling...but it gets better at night when I put my feet up. Shoes are a problem. Right now, I have about 2 pairs that I can comfortably wear...barely.

At work, I walk in, immediately take my shoes off, and put on a pair of slippers. I don't put my shoes back on until it's time to leave. I look ridiculous, but I don't care...comfort is key.

This week, every night between 6:30 and 7:30pm, I've started to have heartburn.

Yuck.

So far, TUMS are my friend...and are working.

Everyday I am amazed that I am still pregnant and feeling good.

Our goal for me carrying the twins is 38 weeks....so, we could have babies in 10 weeks!

Eeek!

Please talk me off my ledge...

I'm being entirely unreasonable, but I can't stop crying.

Just got a memo at work that declares that they are changing our insurance carrier as of June 1st.

Okay, not the best timing, but not much I can do about it.

I was fine until I googled the new company to see if my doctor and preferred hospital are covered.

My doctor is. Thank goodness.

The hospital I want to deliver at, where I had Miss O., and the only hospital in town with a Level I NICU is NOT.

Cue the tears.

I will NOT deliver at the other hospital, I can't fathom having my babies, only to have them whisked away ACROSS town to another hospital if they need to go to the NICU. I just can't.

I don't know what to do...

Getting Somewhere

Ever feel like no matter what you do things stay the same?

M. and I have been trying to slowly work on projects around the house. We needed to move Miss O. downstairs, to free up her room for the nursery. After kicking it around for about 2 months, we started to finally get some progress done at the beginning of March. She's moving into her old toy room, and we went through the toys after her birthday and started talking about it being her new bedroom.

Over the last 2 weeks, with some help from the in laws and some friends, there is something to show off.

I'm SO excited with how it turned out!

The view from the doorway before....



The view from the doorway now...




Before...




After...



One more before...



And the after...

We still need to get some items hung on the walls, but I'm happy to say that Miss O. has been sleeping in her new room since last Saturday night!

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Last night was a LONG night.

Poor Miss O. caught a stomach bug.

Let's just say that we were up until the wee hours with a pretty sick little girl.

M. stayed home from work with her today, as we're hoping to save my sick days in case of bed rest. He's such a trooper!

She's much better now, and I think she'll be okay to go to school tomorrow.

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Thank you all SO much for the kind words about my belly pic!

You know how to make a girl feel good! :)

You Might Want To Shield Your Eyes...

Last week's belly pic....25 weeks...good lord!

Again!?!

Headed in yesterday for my 26 week appointment.

My name was called, and M. and I headed on back with the nurse. THE nurse, who 2 weeks ago didn't notice the label "twins" all over my chart. I thought to myself, "Hmm...wonder how this will go?" but I figured it's only been 2 weeks, she'll remember.

Once in the room, I was weighed, blood pressure taken, and then the doppler came out.

She quickly got a heartbeat, declared it as 152 and started to wipe off my belly. AGAIN.

"Uh, I'm expecting twins..."

Same blank look, no apology again.

She half-heartily placed the doppler on the other side of my belly, and started searching. M. and I looked at each other, and didn't hear anything. "133", she said. "The doctor will be in to talk with you.".

As soon as she was out the door, I told M. that was the same nurse...he was shocked. I felt like maybe he thought I overreacted last time, and was glad he experienced the same thing. Both of us were uncomfortable about the second heart rate she gave us, and told my doctor as much.

That, along with the fact that Baby B has been a little lazy over the last few days, won us a trip to the ultrasound room.

As soon as they placed the transducer on my belly it was apparent why I thought Baby B hadn't been moving much. The first thing we saw were 2 heads, one on each side of my belly button.

Baby B is no longer transverse, hanging out at the top of my uterus, and Baby A is no longer head down.

Both babies and my fluid levels looked great!

Baby A is weighing in at 1 pound, 11 oz. She has her thumb on her nose.

Baby B is weighing in at 1 pound, 15 oz. He is sucking his thumb.

This is the biggest difference in their weights yet, but I'm being told that it's nothing to worry about at this point.

Pinch me, I still can't believe we're still having babies!

Happy Anniversary, Braces Bunchers!

Last spring, after a rough couple of months of dealing with loss number 5, JJ posted about the Braces Bunch.

I had noticed the logo on a few blogs I read, but didn't know what it meant. After reading her post about the snail mail she had received over the previous 2 years, I decided to join the group.

Best decision ever.

Not only did I gain some new, loyal readers but I've expanded MY reading list as well. I have about a shoebox full of cards that I've received over the last year...each and every one of them has meant SO much to me.

I look forward to the next year to see what's in store for all of us...and I can't wait to send out more cards and goodies to the Braces Bunchers!

The Results Are In...

...and after a very LONG three day wait, I finally have an answer to my pass/ fail question.

I passed my 3 hour glucose test!

*doing a happy dance*

Thank you ALL for the positive comments to my worries and concerns...that is what I love about this community. Either way, I know that I would have had support, pass or fail.

Now, I'm off to have some chocolate & some ice cream! ;)

Tests & Renovations

A lot has been going on the last couple of days at Not The Path I Chose...

First of all, I went in Monday morning for my 3 hour glucose test. Happy to say I survived, with minimal discomfort, but no results yet. I'm hoping to hear tomorrow, as it took them 2 days last week to let me know the results.

If you've never experienced it, here's a rundown.

You have to fast before the test, so I was ordered to stop eating and drinking at midnight on Sunday. Monday morning at 8:30, I went into the office where they drew a fasting blood draw, then proceeded to have me drink an even sweeter version of the drink from the one hour test. I had 5 minutes to drink it all...I just tried to chug it. I was hoping for a little bit of water after that, but the lab tech said no. Back to the waiting room I went, waiting for an hour. Then my name was called, and they stuck my other arm for more blood work. Rinse and repeat, I did that 2 more times. The worst point was between hour 2 and 3, when I became super sleepy and a little shaky.

Finally, at about 11:45, I was free to go.

First thing I did was crack open the water bottle I brought and drank it down. Then I quickly consumed the cereal bar I brought, hoping to stave off a headache that was brewing. After getting home, I ate lunch and napped. Overall, it wasn't too bad...fingers crossed that I pass!

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We have an old house...I'm a sucker for the character that comes with them, but they do have downfalls.

When we bought our home, it was a 3 bedroom with one full bath. Over the years, we added a 4th bedroom and a full bathroom upstairs, along with repainting and refinishing floors. It's worked out great for us, as the nursery was upstairs with the master bedroom...and one of the bedrooms downstairs became a playroom.

Needless to say, with 2 more babies moving in, Miss O. needs to be relocated.

We've decided to move her downstairs into her play room, and the babies will get her room upstairs. M. is currently downstairs priming the play room, and he's banished me upstairs to our bedroom while he works.

I feel bad, as we've always tackled home improvement jobs as a team but at least I'll be able to catch up on some blog reading!

Pass or Fail?

On Monday, at my 24 week appointment, I had the 1 hour glucose tolerance test.

Up until yesterday at 4:30pm, I was really hoping that no news was good news.

I was wrong.

Yup, I failed the 1 hour.

My blood level needed to be 139 or below. I clocked in at 155.

On Monday, I'll head back to the office bright and early for the 3 hour test.

I knew there was a chance, especially because I'm overweight and carrying twins. I didn't have a problem with Miss O., so I was hoping that would be the case again.

What I didn't expect was to be so upset by the news...

For some reason, hearing that I failed threw my mind into a tailspin. All I could think of were very negative thoughts. I immediately started to get mad at my body and thinking the worst case scenario.

Why was my body failing me again?

All those horrible self image thoughts left over from the 4 years of struggling to conceive these babies returned. The scars from my all my losses bubbled open, fresh with new worries.

24 hours later, I'm feeling better.

I've managed to shove down those thoughts for now, and I'm focusing on the next test. I'll hold onto the fact that most people who fail the 1 hour, go on to pass the 3 hour.

Fingers crossed that I'm one of them.

Venting

I've got a few things I need to get off my chest...this won't be pretty but I'm sure I'll feel better afterwards.

The biggest vent I have is with my BIL. He never seems to amaze me with his ignorance.
At the family wedding two weeks ago, over dinner, he loudly asked M. if he was going to get "snipped" after we stopped popping out the kids!?!

First of all, this is NONE of his business. Secondly, I would say that considering Miss O. will be 6 years older than the twins, we haven't exactly been "popping" the kids out.

Poor M. started turning red and stammering, so I looked over at BIL and snapped, "No, he's not. It's not exactly easy for us to get pregnant."

He knows that we've had multiple losses and that IVF blessed us with the twins I'm carrying now.

Who does that???

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At my 24 week appointment on Monday, the nurse called me back, took my weight and blood pressure and then got out the Doppler.

I laid back, she squirted the goo on, and quickly got Baby A's heartbeat.

"155", she said, and started to wipe off my belly.

"Uh, I'm expecting twins", I said.

She looked at me with mixture of shock and anger, and then started to try to find Baby B. After I showed her where he likes to hang out, she found him and his heartbeat at 160.

She then told me to go leave a urine sample and told me the doctor would be in shortly. No apology, nothing.

This really irked me.

How did she NOT notice the many notations on my chart that say "twins"? There is no way she could have even looked at it! And how come I got the evil look when I spoke up? It isn't my fault that I had to correct her. But I sure wasn't going to let her leave without hearing both heartbeats!

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I hate it when people ask me when I'm due and then look at me with disbelief when I say July.

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I really hate it when I do owe up to having twins on the way, and all someone can do is tell me how hard it's going to be.

And let's not even get into the "Are they natural?" question.

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I feel better now...

What's annoying you?

Another Milestone

First, it was gettting to our egg retrieval.

Then it was making it to transfer with embies to freeze.

Next, came the agonizing 2 week wait for the beta.

After that, would the betas double?

Holding my breath at the ultrasound, as I prayed for a heartbeat.

The twelve weeks of fear every time I went to the bathroom or felt a cramp or twinge.

Please let there be no blood.

The anatomy scan.

And now, 24 weeks.

Viability.

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When M. and I decided to undertake that IVF cycle in October, we talked about our goals for the cycle.

If we let ourselves dream that it might work, we still knew we had a long time to go before we would feel comfortable. Every one of our 5 losses had ended differently with different signs or symptoms.

Every time we've passed a milestone, I've felt a little lighter.

A little more hopeful.

For M., I think making it to 12 weeks allowed him to relax and believe.

For me, it's taken a little longer.

I'm still pregnant.

Please babies, bake for as long as you can, you are already so loved.