Time.
It's such a fluid thing.
Minutes can creep by, while hours sometimes pass in the blink of an eye.
The last few days, I've alternated between wanting to meet these two little ones and begging for them to have more time inside of me.
When they are both moving around, kicking, I try to store away every movement, how it feels in a little corner of my brain. Let's face it, this is probably the last time I'll ever be pregnant...I want to memorize every feeling, store the memories away for later.
Pain changes my perspective.
When the heartburn, lower back aches, or pelvic pain kicks in, I find my mind thinking about the end. I imagine holding the two of them in my arms, looking at their sweet little faces. I look forward to having my body back as my own...not that it's going to look the same, but to have control over it. I want to see my feet, wear my wedding rings, have a cup of coffee, if I so desire.
I can't control time, and I'm sure once they are here I'm going to feel the same way. Some days I'll want to fly by and others I'll want to freeze and keep forever.
Either way, it won't be long now...
of course sweetie, it won't be long! But everyone says the last few days are the longest! Thinking of you and look forward to seeing those cute little ones too! Fran
ReplyDeleteGetting very excited for you. Hope those two stay in for as long as they need to come out healthy!
ReplyDeletexoxo
I can completely understand where you are coming from. I'm both excited and anxious these days!! I have a love/hate relationship with being pregnant. :)
ReplyDeletenope. not long at all, now!
ReplyDeleteI'm the same way, though. Sometimes I want to freeze the clock, keep him tiny. Other times (like in the middle of teh night) I want him to be over this stage.
Just a couple more weeks, right?! WOo hoo!!!!
ReplyDeleteI can relate. I remember being in bed rest and soaking up every second of being pregnant, while at the same time wanting so bnd to meet her ASAP. Enjoy these last days, you will miss being pregant and will enjoy evn more being a mother
ReplyDeleteYou are so close! Pregnancy is full of mixed emotions, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteIt's so weird. I found myself thinking the other day that I wished I was still pregnant, so that it would be easier to take care of these boys! The grass is, alas, always greener, it seems, because I so vividly remember thinking that I needed the boys OUT OUT OUT, and I truly may not have mentally survived another couple of weeks with them in there. But yeah. Twin pregnancy is hard. Twin parenting is hard. You're at that cusp of pregnancy where it's really no better or worse one way or the other-- yes, the physicalness of being pregnant with twins is almost immediately relieved by birthing them, but the physicalness of twin parenting (my kingdom for an hour of sleep...) is just-- my god, it's ridiculous. I can't even imagine doing it with another child at home. Though if we had a child already, we may have had the advantage of being a bit more prepared for the insanity. I don't know.
ReplyDeleteAnyhow, I don't at all mean for this to be a "downer" comment, just that I find it so funny that I was so recently begging for the pregnancy to be over, and am now wishing I could put them back in, just for a little bit!