Randomness

So, I posted like, I don't know, ONCE this week!?!

That is sad.

It's not that I don't want to post, I'm just struggling with finding time to do so.

Chances are that next week won't be much better. Miss O. turns 6 next Sunday, and we're having a party, and, of course, I'm making a cake.

Stick by me, I promise it will get better.

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Last week's photo challenge answer was...

A marshmallow gun!

Two of my little cousins got them for Christmas and had a great time shooting them across the living room! Even the "big" kids got into the action!

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I've spent a lot of time researching cloth diapers this week.

It's something I never even thought about with Miss O.

I love the idea of doing it, and have the lingo down, but I still have a few concerns. Like laundry, or more importantly, how much MORE laundry this might create.

If you're a cloth diaper user I want to hear from you! What do you like best? AIO's, fitteds with covers, prefolds? Am I going to be overwhelmed?

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Work.

Should I return after the babies?

I automatically thought that the answer was NO, when we found out we were having twins. As the time is growing closer, I'm having second doubts.

Can we survive on one income? I'm sure we can, but a lot of our "comfort" level would be gone.

Will I go crazy without some adult interaction?

Most of all, I've realized that I'm not giving up a job.

I'm giving up my career.

My current employer has been my employer for the last 12 years. I've worked here since before I graduated from college...just changing duties and classifications over the years.

I just don't know.

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We have reached the 19 week mark!

There is no doubt that I'm pregnant, instead of just fat...and I'm starting to feel movement on a much more regular basis.

Big ultrasound is scheduled for March 8th, in a little over a week. Hopefully, we'll find out what's baking in there!

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That's my wrap up. I've been crazy busy. It was a marshmallow gun...I'm thinking about cloth diapers...Should I return to work?...and I'm counting the days until our big u/s!

What's up with you?

Trying To Remember

It's been quite a while since I've been this pregnant.

Over 6 years, to be exact.

My pregnancy with Miss O. was textbook from a physical standpoint. Other than some back pain and a little swelling at the end, I had no problems. Mentally, though, it was a really rough time.

My mother had been fighting ovarian cancer for over 4 years when M. and I found out we were expecting. The news brought a lot of bittersweet joy to both of us. She was so excited to have a grandchild. By the time I was 7 months pregnant, she was losing her battle.

Sadly, four days after my baby shower in December of 2004, she passed away surrounded by family.

I know that I handled everything better than I would have had I not been pregnant. I had to eat, it was for the baby. I had to sleep, it was for the baby. I kept going because I had to, it wasn't just about me, but I had to think about how my actions would affect my unborn child. This isn't to say I didn't grieve, but I couldn't fully breakdown, because I worried about my baby.

I was on autopilot.

There is a lot I don't remember about my first pregnancy. I really wish I would have been blogging or at least have kept a journal. Just this morning, I thought I felt some real movement from the twins, and thought, "Hmm, wonder when I felt movement with Miss O.?".

I honestly have no recollection of that moment.

I remember how she felt, her little jabs and kicks, but I have no idea when that started. I can't remember if I had heartburn or trouble sleeping. Or when the braxton hicks contractions began. And pictures? Nope, I think I have only one or two from my entire pregnancy with her. So much of that pregnancy is a blur.

It's almost like being pregnant for the first time again.

I think that's why I'm trying to soak everything up this time. I've been taking "belly shots" every three weeks, since I hit the 9 week mark. I've been reading two pregnancy books, but only to the week I'm at. I'm anxiously awaiting the moment that I will feel these two squirming around on a regular basis.

I just want to enjoy it, remember it, really experience it.

Friday Photo Challenge: What Is It?

I stumbled across the Steadfast Warrior's Friday Photo Challenges...what a great idea!

This week, the theme is "What Is It?"

Multiple Musings

It's only Tuesday, but it's been quite the week already.

This week will be the first time in 6 weeks that I'll work all 5 days. I brought it on myself, I had vacation time that if I didn't use by February 15th, I would lose it. So, I've been taking Monday's off, and a random day here or there. It's been wonderful, but I think I'm a little spoiled now.

Yesterday was a crazy day at work. The kind I like. A big story broke in our town, and after a bunch of phone calls, I had a great interview segment lined up with some of the key players to help expand our coverage.

The Governor, a congressman, and two neighboring mayors agreed to talk live on my newscast.

It was great, until they wouldn't stop talking. Each newscast I have a certain amount of time for news, the rest is taken up with commercials, weather, and sports. For example, in my HOUR long newscast, I really only fill about 18 minutes of that hour.

And you just can't tell the governor to stop talking.

It was a LONG stressful hour, and I had to make some really quick decisions in the control booth on what stories were still going to air, and which were not, but over all it was awesome. I felt like I was alive, although exhausted by the time I hit the door to leave.

After work, I picked up M. and Miss O. and headed to the car dealership. I gave in. We officially own a mini van now. I know it's a mental hurdle I need to let go, but my 21 year old self swore I would NEVER drive a mini van. Period. With 2 infants on the way, and Miss O. to drive around, it's the logical solution. I know that. We needed something that allowed Miss O. to get into and buckle up without my assistance. Our new Sat.urn Re.lay 3 with captain chairs will do just that. It's just going to take some time for me to get used to it.

Even more than the mini van, I'm struggling with clothes right now.

I know, listen to the pregnant woman whine, "Oh, woe is me, I finally got what I wanted and now I can't wear any clothes." It's stupid, I know, but since I refuse to walk around unclothed, it's a problem.

My old maternity clothes are 6 years old, and have been passed around to 3 different friends over the years. I went through them at about 12 weeks, and weeded out the worn out, stained, and dated pieces. Sadly, that left me with one pair of jeans.

So, I invested in 2 pairs of jeans from moth.er.hood mat.ern.ity.

I hate them! The "secret" panel? It's like pantyhose, all the way around the top of the jeans...comfy, yes BUT they fall or roll down all the time. I'm constantly hitching up my pants, my shirts feel too short, because the dang panel is showing as they slip down.

"Secret" my a$s.

I don't know what to do!?! All I know is I don't want to spend money on new pants, but it's quickly becoming apparent that I need to. What are you other lovely expecting twin mommies wearing? Am I going to be stuck wearing yoga pants for the next 4 months?

I can't be the only one with this problem, can I?

Happy Valentine's Day!

♥ Wishing you and your loved ones a wonderful Valentine's day! ♥

M. and I never do much for this holiday, usually a card and dinner. We try to make it more about time then presents.

Today has been wonderful. Miss O. and I surprised M. with cards and chocolate in bed this morning. After church, we did a little shopping and a LOT of window shopping for future buys.

We just got back from dinner. M. thought it would be nice to go to a hibachi restaurant...it was a great idea! Miss O. loved watching the "show" as she called watching our dinner prepared. I felt a little bad at first, because we were seated with 2 young couples, but Miss O. was on her best behavior and they didn't seem to mind in the end.

I hope you had a great day!

Snow, Troublemakers, and More Snow

I'm tired of the white stuff. You know, the snow.

There, I said it.

I know that where I live, in February, snow is not uncommon. In fact, most of the time I roll my eyes at people who complain about it. Let's face it, it's part of our climate.

But 26" in less than 7 days? Ridiculous.

Fortunately, we escaped the worst part last weekend. M., Miss O., and I headed on down to Richmond, Virginia to visit some family on Thursday night. We had a very relaxing weekend, where I didn't have to cook a meal, and enjoyed talking, reading, and even snuck a nap in.

On Sunday, after a LONG drive back up North....we arrived to find about 19" of snow on the ground. Our great neighbors plowed our driveway, thank goodness, but didn't notice that the snow had drifted up the 4 feet of stairs to our front porch. M. had to borrow a shovel to dig our way to the front door.

Monday morning brought sun, but cold temps as we headed out to my 16 week appointment. Miss O. got to tag along, as her school was on a 2 hour delay. It started innocently enough, with getting weighed and answering the nurses questions. Then she pulled out the Doppler, to find the babies heartbeats. For the next 5 minutes, she kept trying to find a heartbeat. I could see M. out of the corner of my eye, shaking his head like everything was fine....he totally thought the slow swoosh of my heartbeat was the babies. I tried not to panic, as the nurse gave up and announced that the doctor would find them.

Over the 10 minutes, as I waited for the doc to come through the door, I desperately tried not to think the worst or cry. All I could think was that Miss O. was in the room and this was going to be really hard to explain. Finally the door opened and the nurse practitioner walked in, explained that the doctor was on a delivery and grabbed the Doppler. She managed to find one heartbeat, maybe because she was willing to leave my lower abdomen, unlike the nurse who stayed down by my pelvic bone the whole time. At this point, I started to cry....I couldn't hold it in anymore. The nurse practitioner said, "Don't worry, we'll just have an ultrasound and everything will be fine!" I don't know how I didn't snap back at her, because at this point I was sure that something horrible had happened in my uterus over the last 4 weeks.

Off to the ultrasound room we went, where the 2 little troublemakers were dancing around, stacked just like they were on a bunk bed. Baby B was on top with Baby A hanging out just below him. I can not put into words the relief I felt watching them move around, and hearing their heartbeats. They are very high in my uterus, just to the right of my belly button...everything measured perfectly and Miss O. claims one of them was playing "peek-a-boo" with her. The tech tried to see the sexes of the babies, but they were stubborn and wouldn't uncross their legs.

Next appointment is scheduled for March 8th and we'll have the big anatomy scan then....I can't wait to see what's baking in there.

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So, how was your weekend? Anything eventful happen?

Have you dug out of your home yet?

Thoughts Written Out Loud

It's one of those days, where my brain is just full, yet I can't compose a normal blog post....

~ M. is out of town and isn't returning until tomorrow night. I miss him.

~ I met with my BF from college on Monday and had lunch...it was really nice to catch up!

~ Thank you to EVERYONE for your suggestions to my last post...this is why I love this community SO much!

~ Bab.ies R Us is having a great sale for people like me, I traded in Miss O.'s car seat that was almost 6 years old and got 25% off a new one. I happened to find one on clearance and STILL got the 25% off! Sweet!

~ I've been having these weird feelings in my abdomen...not painful, but more like a quick pull or tug from the inside??? Especially if I take a big breath in or twist to one side.

~ We're heading down South to visit some family in VA this weekend. Yay!

~ My laptop refuses to copy from photo.bucket and paste into blog.ger. What is up with THAT?

~ Burning up vacation days at work is nice, but I know I'm going to dread working 5 days a week again real soon.

~ Anything tangy or sour is what I want to eat. The other night I ate 2 helpings of 3 bean salad for a snack before bed! At least it has protein in it, right?

~ I'm struggling with my identity as a blogger. I think my lack of posting is stemming from worrying about offending someone now that I'm pregnant. I need to let this go.

~ Pumpkin pie rocks.

~ I'm convinced the post office hates me. Here's a picture of 2 pieces of mail I received this month. One was my certificate of coverage for my health care. It arrived in 3 pieces. The other a Christmas card from a fellow braces buncher. I'm sorry to say that only the envelope arrived, no card.

~ It was 27 degrees out today, compared to last week, I felt like I didn't need my coat!

So, that's what's rattling around in my mind...