I wish I had a reason for not blogging since my exciting news, but I don't really.
I've been a little nauseous and very tired, but really that's not an excuse for not writing something.
Instead, I've been living in fear.
Every time I go to the bathroom, I brace myself to see some spotting, a sign of the inevitable end. Sad and pathetic, I know.
I can't stop myself, though.
I want to be positive. I want to believe that this pregnancy is here to stay. I want to be excited and hopeful.
Who wants to be the "debbie downer"? The few people who knew we did IVF this cycle, have asked how it turned out...I tend to say something, like, "Everything is going how we want it to, but it's really early and anything can happen." M. is excited.
I'm more like a see saw. One minute I'm up, convinced that I'm going to have a baby, and the next minute I'm in tears, convinced that it's only a matter of time before I miscarry. I hold my breath with every twinge I feel, wondering if strong cramps will be following.
So, that's what I've been doing...